Thursday, August 22, 2013

If you're happy and you know it...

I truly had a "House moment" early this morning. I certainly hadn't planned on being up so early, much less online, and even less getting into it online with the neediest attention whore the internet has ever seen. No, it was definitely an unforeseen chain of events. Life is often quirky like that.

I'm an orderly minded person. A place for everything, and everything in it's place. While I realize not everyone thinks as I do, I believe a society as a whole works best when the rules are followed. If you don't like the rules or policies, you have the option of A) Going elsewhere or B) Breaking them and letting the consequences take their course.

But what if rules and policies aren't enforced? If there's a posted speed limit on a back country road, but there is never any police enforcement, how long do you think people will actually maintain that speed limit? It's only illegal if you're caught, right?? While it might be safer to drive the posted speed, people will do what they want to if they are fairly certain they can get away with "doing their own thing".

As a Demonstrator with Stampin Up (a position for which I might be ending with an abrupt halt, very soon), I have access to the Demo side of the website. Half is for training/ordering/news updates, etc and the other half is a forum with a sample gallery. For the better part of the last two years, I've tried to just check in with the posted samples for ideas and inspiration, and not on the forum boards. Why? Because I hate drama. And that's pretty much all you are going to find over there!

With pretty much any online forum, you will find drama and drama makers. However, most online forums are moderated; meaning there are moderators who keep things on the straight and narrow, ensure rules and policies are followed, and basically make sure that everyone is playing nicely. With the Demo forum, while there are posted rules and policies, there aren't any moderators and rules are not enforced. If things get completely out of hand, and I mean COMPLETELY, SU will delete a post here or there, and perhaps send out their now infamous, canned responses which do nothing to solve the problem.

It doesn't take long before the lunatics are running the asylum! While a few brave souls will try to maintain order, answer questions, offer support and attempt to guide the populace along the proper path, their efforts are often thwarted by those who feel that the rules don't apply to them. The forum is set up with many categories, for any imaginable subject, for the use and enjoyment of all Demos. It only makes sense to post your questions or discussions in the category for which your question or discussion pertains. Easy enough, right?

A new member of course would be forgiven for not knowing the rules and proper "net-iquette" for posting on an online forum. Everyone was new once! But if you've been gently told, and shown and helped - for nearly two years! - and you not only refuse to follow the rules, but you attack those who have tried to maintain order, then you cannot also claim to not have known any better.

Unless....of course, you have an overwhelming need to garner attention to yourself. If you need lots of responses - read here limitless attention - to your posts, putting these non-sensical, irrelevant, and asinine posts in the proper category on the forum might not get you enough views, and therefore the proper amount of replies necessary to fill that empty hole in your body where a soul and brain would normally reside. No, you need a higher "traffic" category, viewed more often, and by more people to satisfy that unquenchable thirst for attention.

At the moment, the boards have all but been held hostage (no pun intended!) by one person. One person who's life mission is to have more posts, more comments, and more awful videos than any other Demo in the 25 year history of SU. If you're not first, you're last, right?? Many of the "older" Demos have alternated between trying to set her straight, and ignoring her completely. Neither tactic has worked. Reporting her flagrant abuse of the boards and violation of numerous policies to the company has also had little effect. They simply can't be bothered to properly run their own board!!

A new tactic of late has been "thread hijacking". If she's going to post a thread that makes no sense or is a blatant attempt to stir up controversy, many will simply change the subject. Whether it's literally changing the topic, or posting pet photos, or sharing what we ate for dinner last night...anything! get the attention off of the poster. That has had mixed results at best, and there is always a "friend" who needs to ask a question (but can't for some strange reason ask it herself), or "I'm just curious what you think about..." post, or a regurgitation of a topic that's already in progress by someone else.

Many might say, what do you care? Just skip over her posts, and go-along-to-get-along!! Live and let live! First of all, she's everywhere, so skipping around her isn't really that easy. She also posts in BIG CAPITAL LETTERS that scream at you from afar. Her spelling and grammar are atrocious. She's just a big pain in the ass!! Also, for those of us who have been around a lot longer, and remember the boards as a fun and worthwhile place to spend time, we're disgusted that one person can wreak so much havoc. It irritates me that there seems to be different rules for different people, and that someone could be allowed to break so many stated policies without any reprimand or consequence. If I have to follow the rules, why should she have free reign and not be held (no pun intended, again!) accountable??

Not only does she not follow rules, she makes vicious, personal attacks against anyone who dares to suggest that her threads are in the wrong category, inappropriate, or inflammatory.

Did I call her a needy attention whore online? Yep, I sure did. After nearly two years of putting up with her crap, I'd had enough. Long before that though, I was called a whole host of other insults by her, without consequence. So obviously SU isn't going to do anything about it, so why not?? This morning I once again pointed out that her latest diatribe was once again in the wrong place.

She accused me of being a stalker. A stalker??? Seriously? Why would anyone want to follow that nutcase??? I'm also a: bully, mean spirited person, horrible mother, terrible wife, trouble maker, unkind, mean, have too much time on my hands, no life and am a completely unhappy person. That's just the stuff I can remember off the top of my head. Somehow, I think she must have been looking into the mirror when she typed that, lol! All because I held her (have to stop using that word!) to the same standard that I hold myself, and everyone else to.

But in regards to my epiphany, I realized this simple fact: I just don't care anymore! The boards have become such a hopeless mess, that I just don't care. The rules will never be enforced, and I just don't care. This crazy bitch will never get enough attention, and I just don't care. I simply stopped caring this morning. It's no small thing for me to give up on something I believe in, but frankly there are just better uses of my time and energy.

So I will remain the Queen of Happiness and welcome all non-psycho people to my realm! I will continue to nurture and maintain my relationships with friends and family. I will continue to share my incredible travel adventures. I will revel in my artistic creations from the kitchen and the stamping studio. And at the end of the day, (the Kardashians really ruined this phrase!!), a life well lived is always the best revenge!

Update: CAROL HELD HAS BEEN BANNED!!! Hopefully she will quit as she's threatening to do. Of course she also threatened "legal percussions" (repercussions in English) before too, so we all know she's full of crap. No one at SU is taking her calls and I find that absolutely hysterical. They don't want to hear from her any more than we do!!! Oh.Happy.Day!


Christine said...

Jeanne, I there with you. I am so sick of her malarky, mischief without consequence. At first I thought that she didn't understand her "unintended" consequences with her ramblings, but then I realized they are totally intended. Did you notice how calm and informative the board was while she was on vacation. Now the drama is back and the slogging through the garbage has begun again. Personally, I do not like to slog, I am too old for it so I will most likely not be commenting anymore.
The demo site holders bear much responsibility in this in their lack of moderation. I have told them so, several times.
Your happy place is great Queenie Jeannie. I have a little Mary Englebreit magnet that someone gave me that makes me the Princess of Quite a Lot. And I am, I am lucky to be able to live with that title in reality.
Enjoy your day.

Susan said...

I am right there with you, Jeanne. I have had enough. She does nothing but cause drama. Funny, my computer has been down and out for the past week and I didn't even miss SC. It is time to move on. We still have here and FB. XXOO

Christina Wernstrum said...

Big Hugs hun! amazing people have to be such attention hogs!

Rita said...

Sad that one person has made the entire forum a waste of time--but she has. So don't waste your time there--good idea. :)

April said...

Sorry for what's happened, Jeannie, and I admire your tenacity!

Lori Sinden said...

I just got home but I wanted to be here right away and tell you that you're exactly right. It's very telling that she spelled it out when she talked about Jean's thread and made hers "more interesting."

Welcome to the Garden of Egan said...

Who has that kind of time?

You are doing the smart thing. Enjoy your journey and stay out of the poop that is in hers.

Mary said...

Everytime I try to join a group or forum, I get so irritated with stupidity that I realize it's more fun to spend time with my actual friends ;o)
Good job girlie, and never look back!

Intense Guy said...

Seems like one of the ugly "human nature" traits ("the rules don't apply to me") has reared its ugly head -

Sometimes I think, we should let the Army loose on 'em...

Unknown said...

I understand how you feel. I stay away from her post.

AliceKay said...

It's sad how one person can ruin something(s) for so many.

Jackie said...

Hey Jeannie, we miss you on SC. Have fun in your "time off" and I hope that whatever you end up doing in terms of SU, it works for you.