Some thoughts...

I know this is supposed to be Post-It Note Tuesday, but I just wasn't feeling it. Although I'm not feeling completely sorry for myself and down (mostly), I'm also not feeling snarky and full of it either. I sort of...just... am. And that's ok too. I've given myself permission to just be. Whatever I feel, is valid. Whatever I want to do, or not do, is ok too. We Americans need to learn to just be. We worry and stress too much, over stupid stuff that usually doesn't matter. So I'm trying to just be more in the moment, and really, more Italian. And more "me" at the same time.

I'm reading Eat, Pray, Love right now. I'm about a third of the way through it and the writer talks about her travels to Italy, India and Indonesia. The three "I's" while also trying to discover who her "I" is, and isn't. Most of us can't afford to take a year off from our lives, travel around, doing whatever we feel like it. But it is rather nice to read the thoughts of someone who could!! It's interesting reading her insights into not only herself, but of Italy as a whole and Italians as individuals. Many times I found myself nodding along in agreement and sharing more than a few laughs.

She had mailed herself a box of books before leaving the states, and was told that it should arrive in 4-6 days. She thinks the Italians must have misunderstood and thought it meant 46 days as it had been two months and no box. She asked her Roman friend if someone could have stolen it or it could have gotten lost. His reaction was to cover his eyes and say not to speak of it again, and that all things are up to the fate of God. If it's meant to be, it will be....or not. So have some more wine, enjoy the food and don't think about it anymore!

It sounds good but it's completely out of character for me. Or is it? Can a tiger ever change it's stripes? There's a gazillion dollar industry in America of "self-help" that seems to believe so. Or it's just getting filthy rich making us believe it. Can you change who you are on a fundamental level? Would you want to?

I don't think I will ever have that completely laid back, what will be, will be attitude of the typical Italian. I respect and admire it on one level, but I am, sad to say, a control freak at heart and will probably remain with my delusions of control. It sounds nice to say, "Don't stress about the small stuff. And it's all small stuff." But that doesn't really help when the rent is due and you're broke, or you're hungry and the cupboards literally are bare. Of course worrying and stressing about it doesn't help much either.

So what's the middle ground between throwing up your hands to the "fates" and stewing in your own toxic, melancholy juices?? I think it's rolling up your sleeves, literally or figuratively as the situation dictates, and doing the most with what you've got. And when you've done it all, really all, then you have to let the rest go.

I am never going to be a Vogue model. I know - you're shocked! But I can eat a healthy diet, exercise regularly and adopt a "just say no" to mumus rule. I don't have to have classicly perfect bone structure to slap on a bit of paint and spackle makeup on my face once in a while. Who needs the latest trend in jewelry, which lately has been huge, tacky and crazy-stupid expensive, when a beautiful string of pearls is always in good taste? I'm not a Vogue model. I'm never going to be a Vogue model. And not only am I ok with that, I'm grateful.

That seed of gratitude,
gives birth to the seedling of happiness,
which grows into the tree of wisdom.

Be grateful. Someone always has it worse; someone always has it better. Stop comparing and just be grateful.

Find the fun. It's there. And you don't have to look very hard or for very long. Just take off your blinders and enjoy it.

Make someone else smile everyday. Make it your daily mission that you cannot go to bed that day, until you've made someone's day. You might be only one person, but you're everything to someone. Even if you don't know it.

Say yes. Often. Yes to the new food, the new store, the new movie, the new adventure. Just say yes!! Be a Yes Woman/Man!!! No one wants to hear no anyway. Don't be a spoil sport!

Be yourself. No one is better qualified to be you, than you. You can strive to improve, but do not strive to imitate. Be you; you're awesome!

So, anyway...that's what I was thinking today...