Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Some thoughts...

I know this is supposed to be Post-It Note Tuesday, but I just wasn't feeling it. Although I'm not feeling completely sorry for myself and down (mostly), I'm also not feeling snarky and full of it either. I sort of...just... am. And that's ok too. I've given myself permission to just be. Whatever I feel, is valid. Whatever I want to do, or not do, is ok too. We Americans need to learn to just be. We worry and stress too much, over stupid stuff that usually doesn't matter. So I'm trying to just be more in the moment, and really, more Italian. And more "me" at the same time.

I'm reading Eat, Pray, Love right now. I'm about a third of the way through it and the writer talks about her travels to Italy, India and Indonesia. The three "I's" while also trying to discover who her "I" is, and isn't. Most of us can't afford to take a year off from our lives, travel around, doing whatever we feel like it. But it is rather nice to read the thoughts of someone who could!! It's interesting reading her insights into not only herself, but of Italy as a whole and Italians as individuals. Many times I found myself nodding along in agreement and sharing more than a few laughs.

She had mailed herself a box of books before leaving the states, and was told that it should arrive in 4-6 days. She thinks the Italians must have misunderstood and thought it meant 46 days as it had been two months and no box. She asked her Roman friend if someone could have stolen it or it could have gotten lost. His reaction was to cover his eyes and say not to speak of it again, and that all things are up to the fate of God. If it's meant to be, it will be....or not. So have some more wine, enjoy the food and don't think about it anymore!

It sounds good but it's completely out of character for me. Or is it? Can a tiger ever change it's stripes? There's a gazillion dollar industry in America of "self-help" that seems to believe so. Or it's just getting filthy rich making us believe it. Can you change who you are on a fundamental level? Would you want to?

I don't think I will ever have that completely laid back, what will be, will be attitude of the typical Italian. I respect and admire it on one level, but I am, sad to say, a control freak at heart and will probably remain with my delusions of control. It sounds nice to say, "Don't stress about the small stuff. And it's all small stuff." But that doesn't really help when the rent is due and you're broke, or you're hungry and the cupboards literally are bare. Of course worrying and stressing about it doesn't help much either.

So what's the middle ground between throwing up your hands to the "fates" and stewing in your own toxic, melancholy juices?? I think it's rolling up your sleeves, literally or figuratively as the situation dictates, and doing the most with what you've got. And when you've done it all, really all, then you have to let the rest go.

I am never going to be a Vogue model. I know - you're shocked! But I can eat a healthy diet, exercise regularly and adopt a "just say no" to mumus rule. I don't have to have classicly perfect bone structure to slap on a bit of paint and spackle makeup on my face once in a while. Who needs the latest trend in jewelry, which lately has been huge, tacky and crazy-stupid expensive, when a beautiful string of pearls is always in good taste? I'm not a Vogue model. I'm never going to be a Vogue model. And not only am I ok with that, I'm grateful.

That seed of gratitude,
gives birth to the seedling of happiness,
which grows into the tree of wisdom.


Be grateful. Someone always has it worse; someone always has it better. Stop comparing and just be grateful.

Find the fun. It's there. And you don't have to look very hard or for very long. Just take off your blinders and enjoy it.

Make someone else smile everyday. Make it your daily mission that you cannot go to bed that day, until you've made someone's day. You might be only one person, but you're everything to someone. Even if you don't know it.

Say yes. Often. Yes to the new food, the new store, the new movie, the new adventure. Just say yes!! Be a Yes Woman/Man!!! No one wants to hear no anyway. Don't be a spoil sport!

Be yourself. No one is better qualified to be you, than you. You can strive to improve, but do not strive to imitate. Be you; you're awesome!

So, anyway...that's what I was thinking today...

22 comments:

Hope said...

I love this post. I am a free spirit married to a very traditionally-minded Brit. I often want to roam the countryside and discover stuff like I did back home, but am often stuck at home dying to escape. I have lost enough in my life to know to live each day like it is your last and I try and share that with my kiddos. Hubby however, is another story. lol

Welcome to the Garden of Egan said...

Beautifully said. Thank you.

Intense Guy said...

*Hugs*

You know... Billy Joel sang this song, "Just the way you are"...

Anonymous said...

This post helped me so much . It was just what I needed . Thank you !

foxy said...

I like this post! You know, I really used to be a "worry wart" myself... but it was getting me NOWHERE and giving me constant migraines. I've really worked hard at changing my frame of mind though... and it's really helped me. When I feel myself going down that road of "where will we get the money for..." or "how in the world will we ever be able to accomplish..." I MAKE myself turn it off. Because you know what? I can't worry about that right now. I can only work on the here and now and will just have to wait and see about the future. Because there's no telling what He has in store for us.

Deanna said...

I'm thinking I like what you were thinking! I'm with Iggy, *Hugs*

April said...

Now, if that isn't an INSPIRATIONAL post, I don't know what is! You blew my socks off, girl! :)

Anonymous said...

Great post! I love that you surprised us. Your right it is good sometimes to just relax and yet it is really hard...

Janiece said...

Here is a BIG HUG!
and yes it is very good to just BE somedays.

Mimi said...

Brilliant girl!

It's easier to have the live in the moment attitude when you have furniture, though.

Sandra said...

Wow, that was inspirational! I read Eat Pray Love, and funny, I had the same thought as you: Lucky her, being able to afford to grieve abroad!....see, always the cynic!
I read the comment you left me, and just wanted to say that taking classes just for fun, not for a degree is the best thing! No stress. No pressure. Maybe after nursing, I'll do that. I love being a student, I just don't really want a job! lol

Pat Wahler said...

Excellent observation! We do need to spend more time counting our blessings and be happy with what we have!

Pat
www.critteralley.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

I wish I could take a year and travel :o) I don't think I could change who I am either, I just take my life one day at a time, HUGS

Mrs. M said...

I am pretty sure the author of that book had her trip paid for by the publisher. We all just need to go out there and find our own publishers! :) Liked your post and totally get it! I don't think I am laid back enough to live in Italy though!!

Tammy said...

I needed that today...I am so hard on myself. I needed to hear that it's okay to do what you need to do for ourselves! Thank you for that girlfriend. I hope your spark comes back...:)

AliceKay said...

I tried to comment a bit ago but I got the nasty words "Service Unavailable" pop up in front of me and it didn't go thru. (that happened on someone else's blog tonight, too)

Thanks for sharing your thoughts today. You can't always be snarky. :) Just be you. *hugs*

Annie said...

you go, darling!!! I just love it and I needed to hear that today so badly. Thank you, sweets!!!!
Hope your snark comes back soon! :)
Hugs!

Heatherlyn said...

I love your blog! I really do!

Right now, this week, I'm out of town spending time with my Mom while she is in rehabilitation from her brain surgery. It sure does help put things in perspective, when you watch people who are having to relearn how to move their hands, learning to walk again, to sit up, where going to the bathroom by yourself is a BIG accomplishment.

I think you are exactly right-on that taking life as it comes also means making the very best of whatever situation we've been given. There is a lot of joy in living.

I listened to a woman pray the other day and she thanked God for the hard days as well as the fun days. I think I have a much harder time thinking to be thankful for the hard days, but really every day gives us good experience and enriches our life.

You are a wonderful person.

Unknown said...

I wish I would have swung by yesterday to read this post...it is beautiful..true and I found myself nodding and sharing a laugh with you as well...thank you for this...I know I'll be coming back to this post time and again when I'm feeling out of sorts!

Unknown said...

I am praying for you Jeannie. I can't imagine what you are going thru... You are going to come out on top though :)

Mary said...

as a fellow control freak, I often have to remind myself, "is this really worth the worry?" Often, it's not, and finding that balance makes all the difference.

Great post girlie!

LindyLouMac said...

Great post and I must get hold of a copy of Eat Pray Love as I just cannot see the film until I have read the book :)