Saturday, April 12, 2008

Women - explained!

The Hormone Guide
Women will understand this and the men should memorize it! Every woman knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!

DANGEROUS:
What's for dinner?
Are you wearing that?
What are you so worked up about?
Should you be eating that?
What did you DO all day?

SAFER:
Can I help you with dinner?
WOW! You sure do look good in brown!
Could we be overreacting?
You know, there are alot of apples left.
I hope you didn't overdo it today.

SAFEST:
Where would you like to go for dinner?
Wow! Look at you!
Here's my paycheck.
Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that?
I always loved you in that robe!

ULTRA SAFE:
Here, have some wine.
Here, have some wine.
Here, have some wine.
Here, have some wine.


13 Things PMS Stands For:
1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweat pants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff
13. Potential Murder Suspect

Thank you Alex M.!!

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