So I was thinking...

So I was thinking during my bloggy "Time Out".......about a lot of things. Thinking about things that made me feel happy, sad, disappointed, ticked off, tickled pink - everything. This is going to be a long post and will most likely be rambling - like my addled brain. But I feel it's worthwhile though, so I hope you will read it all.

When I started this blog, it was for one simple purpose. To keep in touch with my husband during his third tour in Iraq. With internet connections unstable over there and long work schedules, having time online was at a premium. So rather than muddling through a ton of emails, he could just go to my blog to view pictures and videos and see what was happening on the home front.

So that was it. I didn't even know anyone else who "blogged". I thought I was the only one, lol! As I *met* more people online, I invited them over to see my kids and other goings on. It wasn't until Pam (HI PAM!!) told me about SITS that I really heard about anyone else blogging and that there were THOUSANDS upon THOUSANDS of bloggers. Wow! Seriously cool!

And I have met some wonderful people too since then. People who call me and email me and snail mail me outside of the bloggy world, and me to them. People who I would consider "in real life" (IRL) friends. People who are "regulars" on Jeannie's World and comment on every post, and who get regular visits from me too. And yes, I can be honest enough to admit that I DO get a thrill when I see my readers number go up. "Oh yay!" is what I say every single time!!!

But it's not about the "number" for me; it's always been about the people. ALWAYS! I remember when "everyone" was on MySpace. Well not everyone because I wasn't! Then it was Facebook, and now Twitter. Now I don't have a problem with these sites or if people want to use them. It's just not me. And I won't do it. Period. Saying you have 5,000 "friends" on Facebook is just plain ridiculous - seriously!! You don't know these people and they don't know you, so what's the point? Ashton Kutcher was so proud of reaching one million friends on Facebook. Dude - where's your CAREER??????

So yeah, being a people person through and through, it's always been about the people. However, I'm not merely a people pleaser. I'm not a chameleon. Like me or not, I am true to myself. So when I developed a readership of sorts, it started getting a bit harder. What if what I write hurts someone? Or makes them mad? Or makes them leave? And do I care? Should you just write whatever you want, and other people be damned? Where is the line and how do you decide? Are there off limit topics? These are questions that every blogger faces every time they sit down to write a post.

According to some, your blog must be focused and have a well defined theme. And you should stick to that theme. Or else!! (don't ask me what; I have no clue) A review blog. A giveaway blog. A coupon blog. A mommy blog. A hobby blog. A political blog. Uh, no, I don't think so. Not for me anyway. I am way more than just one thing to be pigeon-holed in one small box. And I am not just referring to my fat ass. This is MY blog and MY world. One day you'll get crazy cat pictures, the next Monet paintings, the next a funny Bella video. It's how I roll and I will include it all, and then some, if I want to. I think a one dimensional blog is pretty boring as a regular read. If I'm shopping for electronics and you have a blog with just electronic reviews, then great. But chances are I'll only be over to visit you a couple of times a year, at most.

If staying "focused" wasn't enough pressure on bloggers, apparently you have to provide "value" to your readers as well. When I read that this morning I truly cracked up! Well golly gee!! If my readers didn't find my blog posts "valuable", then I guess they wouldn't come back, right? If my views were that repulsive, they'd comment, or not, and go away. I really feel sorry for anyone who spends even one second worrying about whether they are funny enough or entertaining enough to keep their readers and attract new ones. My friend Yaya (HI YAYA!!) has tons and tons of readers, and the number is always going up. Why? Because she's funny as hell and keeps it real. Of course being a cute redhead who makes cutie patootie dancing vlogs doesn't hurt either, lmao!!! Bottom line, if you don't like me and/or my blog, that's fine. I'm not losing any sleep over it, and neither should you!

Phat Mommy wrote: "As a writer, your job is to inform and/or entertain. And - make no mistake - if you blog, seek comments, and participate in social media and the blogging community, you are a writer. You are putting words out there for the world to read, and that means you have a responsibility." Oh really? I have a responsibility to the world at large, because I blog? I disagree, strongly!!! I have a responsibility to myself. The rest of y'all will have to muddle through on your own! Some people are getting just a lil too big for their britches and taking themselves (and by extension their blogs) just a little too seriously. I mean come on people, we're talking about BLOGS here!!!!! I know the internet is vast but all these inflated egos out there are sucking up way too much bandwidth. Just because you just came back from a blog convention (?????) and rubbed elbows with "popular" bloggers doesn't make you any bigger or better than you were before you left. Just a tad more obnoxious and self-righteous. Responsibility indeed.

Don't forget that you can't write about taboo subjects either. Don't discuss religion. Or politics. Or anything that might make someone uncomfortable. EVER! Here's a newsflash folks. God comforts us not to make us comfortable but to make us comforters!!! Sometimes being uncomfortable is the first step of much needed and important CHANGE in your life!!! Sometimes you have to get to that point of being so uncomfortable that you do something about it! It's a huge world out there - get out of your comfort zone!!!! Actually attempt to see the world through different opinions, cultures and viewpoints.

Then there are the debates: to have ads, or not to have ads. To do reviews, or not to do reviews. PR or no PR. There are some pretty strong opinions on both sides. Personally, and this is just my opinion, I find blogs that are all cluttered up with a bunch of ads to be distracting. Bigtime. There is advertising everywhere and I don't really want to see it on blogs. So you won't see it on mine, because it's mine. If you have it on yours, that's your decision. I don't blog to make money. I don't WANT to blog to make money. For me, once it becomes a job, then it's by definition not just for fun. And I don't want my blog to ever be anything BUT fun for me. So if it isn't fun, I'm not going to blog.

Which brings us full circle to my self-imposed Time Out. There are people who think they know why I took a break. But they're wrong. Or at most, only marginally right. Here are some things I've thought about and decided:

1. I'm re-claiming the ownership of my blog. It's mine. All mine. All the time. I will gladly share it with you....but share it, not co-own it with you. Have an opinion? Great! let's hear it. But opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one but you should be careful with who you share yours with. 'Nuff said?

2. I'm also happy if you love my Caturday posts for example, but if I don't feel like doing it one week, please don't email me asking me where the hell "your" Caturday post is. It irritates me and makes me use bad words, which is giving my monitor serious self-esteem issues.

3. I'm an Air Force vet and an Army wife - so if you have negative things to say about our military, chances are good that I'm not going to let it slide. It won't be pretty either. Soldiers do not decide, or dictate national or international policy. So if you don't like a particular policy they are involved in, please get in touch with those giving the orders. Also derogatory and/or cliched prejudices against our military are equally unwelcome.

4. I'm a Republican. You aren't going to change my mind.

5. I'm a member of the United Methodist Church. I am saved through the grace and blood of Jesus Christ. You aren't going to change my mind on that either.

and finally...

6. I have a life. A real life. You know, OFF THE COMPUTER! Sometimes I have the time and desire to post a bunch of stuff, answer emails promptly, do all your tags, etc etc etc. And sometimes I don't. It doesn't mean I don't care about you, or your cause, or your fundraiser, or whatever. It means I'm sometimes busy. Or tired. Or both. Sometimes I can keep all my commitments running smoothly, and sometimes I drop several balls. I am never as capable as I'd like to be, although I will never stop trying. I'm going to make a more conscious effort to worry more about me, my life and my family from now on. Because that is my reason for being, not my blog. I think being a more centered, balanced "me", will make me automatically a happier blogger as well.

Well, that's the plan anyway...