Tales From The Crypt

Things that make you go hmmmm…

Some people are crazy. You might already know that. But seriously, some people are really, really, REALLY, effing, loony-tunes-crazy. And then there are people who are low-life liars and backstabbers. I got my more-than-full share of both this week. Read closely, take notes and learn from my trials. I would hate for anyone else to live through this too. Many of you wanted the “full poop” on what went down over here. So here ya go.

Most of you “regulars” know I belonged (yes, past tense) to a stamping group. It was mostly comprised of people significantly older than myself. But no biggie, we all enjoyed stamping and making cards. I think it’s important to know that I was invited to this group. OK? Invited.

It’s also important to know that this particular group of older people, was about the most persnickety, closed-minded, “set in their ways” group of old biddies you never wanna meet. I had already told Thomas that I was pretty sure I was going to drop out of the group because it wasn’t a good personality fit (as in I actually HAD one!), was way out in the boonies, and as much as I loved stamping staying there 6-7 HOURS to make 4 cards was a bit much even for me.

During the May get-together, the person who hosts the group (we’ll call her Ms. R), had a Pampered Chef party at the same time. So instead of everyone bringing their own brown bag lunches as usual, we’d all share the foods made there. Cool beans.

Afterwards, Ms. R comes up to me and asks if I’d like to host a party of my own. I said I really didn’t think I knew enough people on post who had money to make it worthwhile. (I had had a show of my own before and not many showed up who said they would because it wasn’t close enough to payday - *sigh*). And she said, not to worry, that we’d just have it at her house again, during stamping club and then no one would have to worry about lunch again.

Still, I didn’t want to have the responsibility of having everyone’s orders come to my house, on post, when almost everyone else lived wayyyyy out in the boonies. Thomas works, and takes our one car to and from work. So that means I don’t have the car during the day. Again, she said no problem, and that she’d have the items sent to her house and she’d deliver them like she would for her own party.

Are you with me so far? SHE ASKED ME to host a party at her house. SHE OFFERED to deliver the orders to everyone. So I said yes. OK, fine.

The June meeting rolls around. I wanted to bring Rachel, because frankly if I’m going to be somewhere 6-7 hours, I want to have some conversation, and I was getting tired of being bored and mostly ignored. I had already decided that this was it for me and I wouldn’t have even gone this month, but that I had GIVEN MY WORD to be a Pampered Chef Hostess and everyone was counting on me for lunch. No one had Ms. R’s phone number that I knew, so I could make sure it was ok to bring her, so I emailed her. It was all I had. I never did get a response. So I figured, what the hell, she’s got a huge house, I’m the one footing the lunch and hello?! it’s the south – where hospitality rules, right??? Yeah, not so much.

While not much was said, to me, about Rachel being there, what was said pissed me off. I was really ready to just go home, but stupidly stayed. I really need to learn to listen to my gut instincts more!!!!

Fast forward a couple of weeks. Without my permission, the PC order was sent to my house. I was informed after the fact. Apparently Ms. R was working many hours and was afraid of not being home when the order arrived. It seemed like a lame excuse to me as they will just leave the order on your porch, but whatever. I was again assured that Ms. R would be picking it up from my house and delivering it.

So the order comes and I separate it all out. It happens that Rachel is over when it’s delivered so she gets her stuff too, and helps me pack up everyone’s bags. I call and leave a message for Ms. R to tell her that all the stuff is in, and ready to go.

When she finally calls me back, I get a big rambling story about how what long hours she’s working every day and how she’s just not sure when she’ll have time to pick it up. I told her I was unable to bring it to her, LIKE I FREAKING TOLD YOU IN THE BEGINNING OF THIS MESS!!, but that it was ready to go when she had the time and I would make myself available to her when she did have the time, even if it was really early in the morning or late at night.

Three or four days pass. THEN I get this real pissy email from Ms. R asking, “Don’t you ever drive?? Or won’t your husband let you have the car??”. What.The.Hell. Yes, Ms. R I DO drive. Yes, Ms. R my husband “lets” me do whatever I damn well please, thank YOU very much! Not one to let things go, I immediately emailed her back, reminding her of what she asked me to do and what she agreed to do and told her I no longer wished to be a part of the group. For all I cared, that box of PC could sit in my garage till hell froze over, but I wasn’t going to lift a finger to move it.

Still, I wasn’t that upset because I was already planning to leave the group anyway and some old people are just, well, wankers and that’s just the way it is. However, I was not at all prepared for what happened next.

The lying, backstabbing, nutbag “friend” who got me messed up with this loony bunch in the first place, who I might add wasn’t even THERE when all this went down, chimes in on the group’s yahoo board with her “two cents”. She apologizes profusely for my “unacceptable behavior” for intruding on Ms. R’s hospitality by having a PC party in her home without her permission AND for bringing a total stranger there as well! What.The.Hell?????

Am I sorry? Yes.

I’M SORRY, Ms. R that you can’t remember anything you said or did two weeks ago.

I’M SORRY, that you are working crazy busy hours at your job.

I’M SORRY, that it was an inconvenience to do what you said you would.

I’M SORRY, that I allowed myself to be pressured into doing something I didn’t want to do to “be nice”.

I’M SORRY, that in this armpit of Georgia the people are completely nutz!!!!

I’M SORRY, that I ever got mixed up with any of you to begin with.

I’M SORRY, that I’m not in Italy right now, happily forgetting you all!

And Ms. B? The next time you are going to stick your big, fat nose into something which neither involves you, nor concerns you, and you are planning to stab your FRIEND in the back? Do make sure you don’t copy that friend in your lying, back-stabbing email, okie dokie??? It just makes you look STUPID on top of everything else!

UPDATE: *sigh* Ms. R called. Seeing how my husband had JUST come home, and seeing how he's been gone more than home in the last three weeks, I wanted to just BE with him. Not get into a pissing contest with a psycho. She left a message...

(turn your speakers all the way up, it will still be hard to hear)
Now, I can hear Pam from MI laughing already, but in case you couldn't hear it, she said: "Jeannie this is Ramona. What? You're too CHICKEN to answer your phone now?? Bye!". OK folks, I am a great many things but "chicken" sure the hell isn't one of them. If this crazy bitch realllllly wants to get into it, then I say BRING IT ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Rachel couldn't believe it either, but she and her family will be having dessert with us tonight after the post carnival, so I TRIPLE DOG DARE YOU TO CALL BACK THEN!! I will be more than willing to provide the "entertainment".......

*Italy!* *Italy!* *Italy!*
There's no place like Italy!
There's no place like Italy!
There's no place like Itay!