Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Great Tip Tuesday!

I just can't find the stuff for today's post (grrrr!), so I offer this instead!
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Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks went down easy. He didn't even remember how he got home from the party.

Jack had to force himself to open his eyes... The first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the night stand with a single rose. Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.

He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order. So is the rest of the house.

He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge blackeye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Jillian"

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is a hot breakfast, hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, "What happened last night?"

"Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door."

Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table?"

His son replies, "Oh THAT! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, Leave me alone, I'm married!!"

Broken Coffee Table $239.99
Hot Breakfast $4.20
Two Aspirins $.38
Saying the right thing, at the right time, PRICELESS!!!
Happy St. Pat’s Card

8 comments:

Unknown said...

ha!!! thats a great one!! thanks for strting my st patricks day off with coffee all over my keyboard!!!! LOLOL im still laughing!!!! hppy st patricks!!! slainte!

April said...

That was excellent, my friend! Happy St. Paddy's Day!

Unknown said...

I've seen this one and I still laugh and love it every time I read it!

Heatherlyn said...

Oh, that is GREAT!

Vickie said...

LOL!!!! This one still makes me laugh!

Happy St. Patty's Day to you:)

Shan G said...

Now THAT'S funny as hell! LMAO!

MaBunny said...

LMAO! never heard that one before! Thanks for the giggle!

Donnetta said...

LOVE IT!! Too funny!